CHESSNOID

One of the greatest things about the internet is the virtual community that simply exists to connect everyone from the real world no matter where they live. Whatever you are searching for, this is the place where you can turn to strangers willing to help you find it just because they are kind in heart. One of the things I love to do is search the internet for inspiration and new ideas.

I am a big Anthony Robbins fan and have listened to his CDs. I have also watched the Secret video. I am truly grateful for all the blessings in my life. I blog to share what I can with you. Awhile back I was reading different blog posts from the Millionaire Mommy Next Door which I subscribe to her RSS feed so as to not to miss her posts. One of the posts she shared was very touching because it was very personal.

I mentioned it on my blog and emailed her for permission to reprint it here because I really liked it. She emailed me back and said it was OK with some conditions. Thank you, Jen, for allowing me to do so.

Below is a post of “I Choose Happiness. Do You?” by the author Jen from Millionaire Mommy Next Door reprinted with her permission.

I Choose Happiness. Do You?

Four years ago, my husband and I sold our country farm home. Our intention was to kick start our early retirement with a year-long travel adventure across America in an RV. We planned to submit our adoption paperwork before leaving so we’d keep busy during the long wait for a referral. During our road trip adventure, we planned to keep our eyes peeled for the perfect place to call our next home. We were ecstatic about the prospect of living as vagabonds for a whole year, then welcoming a child into our lives.

Two months after selling our home and placing our pet goats, chickens and horses with new owners, my mom was diagnosed with a rare blood cancer. Whoa. Not only did our trip preparation come to a screeching halt, but so did my carefree and positive outlook. My mom wasn’t just family– she was one of my dearest friends. She was only 59. She’d always been extremely active and healthy. She was going to be such an incredibly fun “Gramz” for our future daughter. I was completely thrown for a loop.

My mom lived with my husband and me for much of her two-and-a-half-year-long battle with cancer. I watched helplessly as her once strong body weakened, withered and starved. I’ve never before felt such intense and prolonged pain.

I realized I had to do something to avoid going completely out of my mind with fear, grief and overwhelm. I tried all the usual things: support groups, therapy, sleep. While these things certainly helped, I discovered something even better. And it was so ridiculously simple.

During this intensely difficult time, I realized that I could be happy anyway.

How? I made it my mission to look for at least five things each day that make my heart melt, my soul sing and my smile grow. I wrote a list of five happy moments everyday. I actively searched for things to add to my list. My focus changed and in turn, so did my mood. I learned that happiness takes practice. With practice, I developed a habit of feeling happy.

At first I felt like a traitor. How could I think about happy things while my mom suffered? Was I being unfair, insensitive? Fortunately, I realized that I couldn’t be a good caregiver for my mom when I felt bad. Fortunately, I chose happiness over guilt.

I learned an invaluable and powerful life lesson: It isn’t circumstance that dictates whether I live a happy life — rather, it is a matter of choice. I can succumb to sadness and overwhelm or I can choose to feel gratitude, love and happiness.

I know it sounds hokie, but give it a try anyway. Right this minute, grab a notebook and write down five things that make you happy. If a negative thought pops up, wave it away and look for something positive. Just in case you’re having a really “bad day”, I’ll offer a few ideas to get you started:

crisp autumn air

the smell of puppy breath

reading the Sunday newspaper

creative photography

vine-ripened garden tomatoes

family

friendships

a good book

surfing the internet

wildflowers

setting a goal

enjoying a massage

watching birds congregate at my birdfeeder

playing hide and seek with my child

chai tea

my favorite wine

buckets of sunflowers at the farmers market

The power of focus is amazing. Recounting painful memories in the beginning of this post was making me feel a bit blue. But after compiling the list of “happy things”, I’m once again feeling, umm… happy!

I continue to develop and practice my happiness habit. I choose to feel happy. What about you?